Amy koppelman biography
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And just like Anna, kids made fun of Pinky. I’ve been researching various childhood responses to trauma in an effort to understand how there seems to be really almost polar opposite directions people tend to go when they’re depressed, traumatized, abused. How is she going to find the time and/or seek out the resources—especially when the very nature of depression makes everything feel futile?
MM: Were you ever frustrated that she couldn’t get better, or perhaps made decisions that made getting better unnecessarily difficult?
AK: She’s extraordinarily selfish, right?
Tell us more?! I said to myself, “I don’t want everything to cut to black right now.” I mean, I just said … I mean, it was just like two days ago. And it was very important to me to have a steady home for them. Could you take me to that moment?
AK: Sure. My kids and my husband always came first. I did a search.
Amy Koppelman:
Does it appear even in the book at all?
Debbie Millman:
Just once.
Amy Koppelman:
Oh wow.
Debbie Millman:
Just once, as the doctor is talking about some of what she might be suffering from.
There was always this huge disconnect between the shit I was writing about and how I was feeling with them, which was very happy. I knew that word, “shame,” and I knew that’s what I was writing about. Do they build? Some people work to overachieve in an effort to prove to themselves that they’re not as worthless as they feel, and other people just give up because they know they have no hope.
The characters in your head certainly can’t hurt you. Because in the book, different than the movie, there’s infanticide, and I remember thinking, “I don’t even know if that’s humanly capable. One thing I think is super interesting about your question about color is that I always refer to those first sort of two decades of my life as the black years.
They were playing and I remember my fingers jumped off the keyboard because it was just terrible.
What do you think she is?” She’s all tentacles. All was reliant on being able to have this release.
Debbie Millman:
It’s not surprising that when you decided to stop … cold turkey, by the way, and I don’t know anybody that’s ever been able to do that … that you went into a major depression.
I got the book to Sarah and she opened it.